Uncertain and swirly

I know it's been a while since I've updated, but things have been in a big uncertain swirl lately. Looks like life will be uncertain and swirly for a while, too, which is driving me bonkers.

Husband is home, his mom is doing very well under the circumstances, and those are both good things. He's ramping up the job search, leaning on all his former co-workers in the area for connections, and we're starting to see little glimmers of hope. Many of those glimmers are in other areas--southern California, Chicago--which may mean yet another move at some point in the relatively near future. The thought of moving again makes me want to stab myself in the eye, but at this point any job is better than no job. So I'm trying to file that under "Things I will worry about later."

I've been offered a job at the restaurant where I really wanted to work. Hooray! They brought husband and me in for dinner, and the food was amazing. The bad news is that it won't start until the end of the month, and even then there'll be a long training period. So it'll be a while before I start making actual money.

That's the bad news: money. It's getting tight. This coffee-shop-job nonsense is dreadful. It pays almost nothing and I hate it with a white-hot fury. I'm considering temping again, just to get out of it (and make some more money).

I had an offer from my old job, to come back and make some money with them for a bit. I really, really wanted to go back, too. I miss everyone there, and I miss feeling like I'm good at something. Like I'm useful and productive. Also, we need the money. Husband wanted me here, though. And with his mom's situation being so, you know, uncertain, I understand that. We may have to fly out of here in the middle of the night at any time.

But I'm tired of feeling buffeted by circumstance. I miss being the breadwinner, I miss my friends, I miss being able to make decisions without having to factor in a bunch of unknowns.